Energy Exchange, Gratitude and Teaching

There is a very interesting discussion happening on Face book in my area(Denver).

A Wiccan priestess and mental health care professional that I respect very much is
asking the question, "how do we live in a alterni-culture that expects a lot from us, and mostly for nothing. I know this has been an ongoing discussion in the larger community for years, and I'm not looking at the idea of money so much as what happened to gratitude and the notion of caring about our priestesses and how they live. Or what about gratitude and willingness to be aware of give and take, and how do you convey that to students in ways that work?"

For the record, I do not have an answer. It's been something I've been thinking about lately. One of my colleagues is writing about guidelines for practitioners and healthy boundaries between energy workers and clients, so obviously the thought is in the ether and therefore should be addressed by as many people as possible.

I'm not Wiccan now. I'm technically a priestess( I preside over rituals both seasonal and transitional), but most of the work I do now is more personal rather than congregational.
I did get my 1st and 2nd degrees in a Neo-Gardenarian tradition, so I know how the student/teacher paradigm works. It is a very solemn, oath sworn teacher responsible for student relationship with strict controls over what the student is doing magically and spiritually.

I realized that paradigm didn't work for me as a student(stemming from my own lessons about control, cults of personality and discernment), so I have been reluctant to impose it on anyone else. So I started a study group a few years ago. Since heathery is described often as the religion with home work, the first year was split equally between studying the Norse world-view and elementary energy work, sensing energy, sensing auras/chakras/wheels/energy centers, grounding, shielding, centering. The second year we spent studying the world view as it applied to present life, runes and more advanced energy work, sensing auras and working with elemental energies. Now in our third year, we've moved on to spell work, journeying and healing.This evolved practice has resulted in I don't have formal students along the Wiccan paradigm as much as I have students-colleagues.

I teach the skills I've learned over many years of trial and error, supplemented with books like Diana Paxson's Trance-portation or the Eddas or Blain's Nine Worlds of Seid Magic. They read, do the work and come to me if they have problems or issues. But there is no intimate life entanglement that I have seen and experienced with the Wiccan teacher/student model. They take responsibility for what they do and they try to work out their problems themselves first. I only get consulted or asked for help if they can't find their way through the issue themselves. Sometimes that makes me nervous, sometimes that makes me relieved. I'm still working it out in my heart.

So what does this have to do with the original question?
To be fair, the person I'm quoting is a very prominent person in the local community. Therefore I'm sure she gets called upon much more often than I do, as I am not a prominent member of my local community, either Wiccan or Heathen.

I believe there is a great deal of gratitude shown by my colleagues, just by the fact they continue to show up to rituals and classes. They are all professional people with very busy lives. If this wasn't important to them, they'd find something else to do.

As far as give and take is concerned, I get as much as I give. They are all kind, generous people that are willing to help me out if I have any problems or issues. The year and a half I spent unemployed they were all very encouraging. I got job interviews with two of their companies based on their recommendations and my son and I never went hungry.

Perhaps the reason that my colleagues understand the give and take is that they were not students in the traditional Wiccan sense. That by leaving them with their sense of self-reliance, they are then more able to and comfortable with giving and taking as part of learning.

Or perhaps my colleagues are different from normal people. Aliens or higher evolved beings or Colorado School of the Mines alumni :)

Like I as at the beginning, I don't have an answer.

As usual, your mileage will most certainly vary.

Ordeal vs. Ecstasy

Despite my many years of working with our world, other worlds and other people, I am still learning and growing myself. It would be a darn shame if I wasn't, for the highest thing we are called to do is "Know thyself" And thyself, that slippery little concept, changes rather regularly.
I started my journey in this life from an ordeal space. Trials to overcome and work through include but are not limited to; mental, emotional and physical abuse, abandonment, rape, depression, paranoia, heartbreak and despair.
I'm much better now :)

A colleague of mine is doing a wonderful thing. He's taking a mental health inventory of all the land mines and razor wire that lie buried in his psyche.
He's embarked on an ordeal that will make him a better person. And I am very proud of him.
At the same time, I am obscenely grateful that I am not in that space now.
Mind you, I still go through periods where I get complacent and the universe has to clue by four me with hideous amounts of pain. Or where I take things for granted and the universe then proceeds to yank those things out from under me.

But the ordeal is not my current primary mode of learning.
It doesn't have to hurt to be meaningful.
That may seem like a no-brainer to most people. To me, it was an epiphany, a revelation so fundamental to my self and my practice that it stole my breath.

I am at this point in my life surrounded by hedonists. My beloved is a hedonist, many of my friends are hedonists and a whole new world has opened up to me.
For ecstasy is their goal.

Not ecstasy that is from a loss of will or consciousness, but rather a deepening of the awareness of the spiritual in all things, in sex, in food, in joy, in avoiding pain.
It has illuminated a deep conflict in myself. I work with ecstastic trance with my shamanistic techniques, to travel to other worlds, to retrieve parts of people that they have lost or left, to see the web of Wyrd as it surrounds us, permeates us, ties us together to the gods, to wights and beings and to one another. But that was the only place where that kind of letting go, feeling deep joy was permissible.
^{If it felt good, it couldn't possibly be meaningful.
Yet now I am surrounded by people that can reach that deep joy regularly.
That make everyday life ecstatic and in touch with the spiritual through simply
making a fantastic meal.
Or having fun sex.}
It is an interesting and illuminating experience for me, an experience that made me really look at my definitions of joy and laziness, pain and ecstasy.

So I wish my friend well as he journeys on the ordeal path.
And dance with joy as I journey on mine.

As always, your mileage on your journey will most certainly vary.

An Apology

I apologize for not posting more often lately.
My life changed in a drastic way and I'm still trying to work out the details.
So everyone breathe.... And talk amongst yourselves(teehee)

Hloafmas

This is one of the most under celebrated holidays for me personally.
And it's only because of the time of year in which Hloafmas falls.
Late summer when I was a child on the ranch in Montana was a busy time of the year for work, bringing in hay, harvesting vegetables, canning, smoking, salting, preparing for winter. Because on a farm or ranch, you are always thinking about how you are going to get through the winter.
In my adult life, summer has become a busy time of year for spiritual work.
That is, spiritual work that involves others. Summer is a time when people come for house wardings, curse liftings, wyrd readings, all the rituals and workings that make people and families feel safe and warm and prosperous.
So, in the spirit of first fruits and reaping what has been sown, health, wealth and happiness to all on this sacred day. Hope your celebrations were wonderful.

Values

As part of International Pagan Blogging Values Month, I thought I would lay down some riffs.

To me, the following values flow from one another through one another until they are one river of conduct, but to break them down-

Courage

Self-knowledge/self honesty

Discernment

Independence

Joyfulness

Courage- As a friend of mine wrote once, courage is not A virtue, it is THE virtue from which all other virtues flow. Courage to face all challenges both internal and external is vital to any kind of meaningful spiritual practice. Courage enables us to look deep into our inner darknesses and learn. Courage enables us to be honest with ourselves even when we don't want to. Courage enables us to call ourselves and others on BS and walk away from it. Courage enables us to be independent when all around us people are clamoring for us to be part of the herd. Courage enables us to manifest joy. Courage also enables us to stand up and model what we believe in.

Self knowledge/self honesty- Know thyself. If you don't know yourself, it's hard to be honest with yourself about what drives you, what frightens you, what angers you, what you love, what weird prejudicial land mines that live in your mind and heart. It should be an ongoing process, because no one knows everything about themselves always. We are too changeable as human beings. And be honest. There are unpleasant messes in the best of person's psyches.

Discernment- When you are brave, self knowledgeable and self honest, then the little BS detector that every thinking adult must have is in place. Use it. It's like a tuning fork, someone tells you something and you listen for the pitch. Does it resonate with you or fall flat? Be responsible for your own discernment, rather than relying on the thoughts and words of others.

Independence-Many heathen constructs are community based, putting the welfare of the many over the welfare of the few. And I'm a believer in community. But if you can not stand on your own and stand up for your own opinions, then you are not living to the fullness of your potential. Independence in thought, word and deed is a good thing.

Joyfulness- There is so much energy, work and time expended in a spiritual practice. If your spiritual practice doesn't lift you up, inspire you, fill you with joy and great gladness, STOP DOING IT. Move on, find something else that does. Now, not every spiritual practice is happy-happy-joy-joy all the time. Some life lessons are hard and painful. But it doesn't have to hurt to be meaningful. And if it hurts more often than it heals, look elsewhere.

In my experience. Your mileage will most certainly vary.

Practical Magic: Severing the Ties that Bind

Everyone has relationships that don't work out, that for whatever reason have gone awry and cause pain and suffering.
And at some time in the heat of the moment, everyone wishes they never met that other person. Everyone wishes they could do something that would make the pain go away.

But that doesn't mean everyone should sever the tie. Because severing a tie between you and another person is serious and permanent. Let me repeat, SERIOUS and PERMANENT.

Instead, there are two intermediate steps, knotting off and filtering.

KNOTTING OFF
Knotting off entails envisioning the tie between you and that other person(I have people visualize a cord or a thread that runs between) and tying a knot in it to restrict the flow of energy, emotions and thoughts between you and that other person.
A helpful focusing chant for me is "I knot away from me all energy that is negative and harmful to my well-being".
You can also use the Isa rune to freeze the connection.
This will give you the time and space to figure out how to solve the problems in the relationship without the constant negative energy input/output between you and the other person.

However, this is only temporary. If you leave a knot too long, a form of soul-gangrene will occur, just like if you left a tourniquet on your physical body too long. So find a way to solve the problem as soon as possible.

FILTERING
Filtering entails envisioning the tie between you and that other person and installing a screen. I like to think of window screens, but I've had people use force field and engineering imagery as well.
A helpful focusing chant for me is "No thing negative or harmful will pass this way. Only that which is positive and helpful will pass to me from thee and from me to thee."
You can also use the Nauthiz or Eihwaz rune as a focus.

Unless you add more negativity to the relationship, this is enough for most bad/painful/toxic relationships.

However, there are some ties or some relationships that are so toxic to your heart and soul that to continue them would do you massive,on-going harm.
I advise that anyone contemplating such a drastic step visit a psychological professional or spiritual advisor to help define this level of toxicity.
I also advise that anyone contemplating such a drastic step first try other steps to correct the problem more gently, whether it is knotting, filtering, negotiation, counselling, self-help work, etc.
If all of these things have been defined and tried, then severing is appropriate.

SEVERING
Severing entails envisioning the tie between you and the other person.
Through that tie, you take back all that you put into the relationship. This takes the form of a list of material things you gave, emotional experiences you shared or thoughts you had about this person.
Then through that tie, you give back all that they gave you in the relationship. This is a pile of material things they gave you and a list of emotional experiences you shared.
In both these instances, it is important to be thorough. Both positive and negative things must be taken back and returned.
Then, envisioning that tie between you and the other person, you cut it three times. I use a scalpel visualization usually, but I have used scissors and in one very nasty case, an axe.
A focusing chant I use is, "Once I cut, to break the tie, Twice I cut to for the pain to fly, three times I cut for the bond to cease, from this life to the next, let there be peace."
You can also use Kenaz to burn through the tie.

As with all things I write here, this is in my experience. Your mileage will most certainly vary.

" TV Cowboy" Definitions

I grew up in Montana in the 1970's, when the last of the last of the cowboys had grown old and sat around telling stories. That self-deprecating, humorous recital of horrific injury and deprivation riding the range, stories of courage and cowardice told like a joke.

So when I watched cowboys on TV, they confused me. "That's not like so and so, " I would say to my father, who would sing me his rendition of the Bonanza theme, "Nobody ever does any work on Bonanza! Sit around all day, don't get paid, Hop Sing does all the work!" My wise father's code for, "Honey, it's not like they've actually talked to real cowboys. It's pretend."

As I read Stephen King's Gunslinger series, I got the same, "Honey, it's not like they talked to real cowboys. It's pretend."(Not that I didn't like the series BTW, but it was definitely based on what someone had seen cowboys and lawmen on TV and in the movies, rather than real life).



So recently I was a reader of a discussion about shamanism on an Asatru list, prefaced with the question "Is it Asatru?".

BTW, this discussion was part of one of those discussions that makes me angry to the bone, the defining of us vs. them with the idea if they are not us, how should the community condemn them. I find this argument pop up in Asatru thought every once in a while, especially from those that have a personal anti-mystic bias, usually because they were brought up in a faith with an anti-mystic bias and despite conversion to Heathenry, they carry that bias still.

And after years of comparative religious theory, my first thought was," This is someone's TV cowboy definition of shamanism."


"Personally, I feel that people who are into mysticism and such belong on the outside of society. And I think naturally they gravitate towards that. As we get closer to the inngarth of society and social mores, we find laws, customs, and taboos. As we get closer to the utgardth, we find the opposite. You can't run a society of Shamans. A society of people who are in constant contact with the Gods, constantly in Shamanic practice, by definition would not be able to enforce rules, customs, or have taboos. This distorts the purpose of society and the purpose of Shamanism. Both are degraded by their integration. Either you try to apply rules to a Shaman, which destroys the project of Shamanism, or you try to have a society without laws, rules, customs, or mores (which would resolve itself into a kind of dystopia). You can't run a society this way. Shamans need that kind of freedom to do what they do. Society at large can't have that.So, while I can respect the project of Shamanism, kind of like I appreciate the project of the Punk Rocker, or the Dadaist, I do not feel that we can build up a religion around it. It would also be impossible to "reconstruct" Shamanism, since by definition, Shamans can't operate at their fullest within any "construction" . The way that people have described it to me is that they see all Nine Worlds at once, and all Time at once. Try forcing a person like that to draw a map, or make a watch, which circumscribes their experience. It's impossible. This is all my opinion on Shamanism. I can appreciate the project, but I can't see it as a religion in and of itself. "

The writer is correct about a couple of things.

Shamanism is not a religion, with a set of gods and goddesses, a cosmology, narratives and beliefs. It's a practice, which is puts one in touch with the gods/spirits/wights/ancestors as part of an existing worldview. It is a job similar to mystics and prophets, those that talk to and interact with the universe in a direct way.

And as a result, those people do gravitate to the outskirts of society. It's hard to be the voice of other worlds. It makes demands on your time, health and sanity in a way that makes just hanging out with your people a difficult thing.

But after that, I differ greatly with the author.

-Mystics do not belong outside of society.- I realize that's more of a personal preference for the writer rather than a stated fact, but ALL religions have a mystical component. Christian mystics such as Julian of Norwich or many monks in the Greek Orthodox tradition, Hebrew prophets like Isaiah, Buddhist Tibetan mystics, Sufi masters, Hindu yogis etc. inspire the people of their community to a closer relationship with their deities of choice, healing those people, prophecy etc. Shamans are a kind of mystic.

-Shamans can't operate at their fullest in any construction-Shamans are constructed and defined by service to their community, not how they define that community, but how that community defines THEM. Shamans can't just call themselves shamans, their community calls them shaman, with all the inherent rights and responsiblities that comes with that.Some societies have their shamans in the middle of the village, some on the edges, but there is no question that they are a vital part of that community. They are the bridge between this world and other worlds.

I am not a shaman. My practice has elements of the shamanistic practitioner(using the methods and models of shamanistic practice to achieve results) because they work. And deep down, whether you are reading accounts of shamans in the Amazon, or Inuit healers or Sami weatherworkers, shamanism is about what works, not the worldview/religion/philosophy trappings, but the energy/ psychology/practicality of practice that gets results for their community.

In my experience. Your mileage will most certainly vary.